All I want for Christmas…

I’m a big fan of Christmas. I love all the festive cheer, good will, over indulgence and sharing my living room with a dead tree.

This year, the humans in the town where I reside have excelled themselves with the volume of twinkling lights and garish inflatable snowmen that frighten the life out of me every time they sway in the breeze. Even the big council tree in the centre of the town seems to have been decorated with care this year. Last year there was a huge knot of lights slung into the middle of it, but I shouldn’t complain as they were probably focussing their time and efforts on ensuring our roads are well maintained and free of potholes!

There are a few things that us dogs really don’t want for Christmas.  We do not want to be made to wear synthetic Christmas pudding jumpers and have plastic reindeer antlers shoved on our heads.  We don’t want artificial treats in the shape of Christmas crackers or Father Christmas.  We don’t want squeaky plastic turkeys or stockings full of dry, cheap, crappy biscuits.

Apparently it’s also a good idea to keep us away from some of the delicious foods such as mince pies which would poison us….unless you are happy to miss out on the celebrations whilst you rush us to the vet and pay an extortionate amount of money to hope and pray that the vet is able to prevent the onset of acute kidney failure.

What we do want is to be invited into the human’s bed on Christmas morning for snuggles, to go for a zoom around on the beach. We want to have prime spot in front of a roaring fire and be presented with a giant smorgasbord board crammed full of high quality, artisan meat products. 

We would like to just chill out in front of the TV, watch Planet Earth and be stroked and scratched on demand.

Peace on earth and good will to all dogs! Have a wonderful Christmas xx